my three-month stint as a nomad

of all things, nomad is not one i thought would be at the top of my list… until i found myself eerily disgusted by my day job (not to be confused with day dream in the slightest) and the feeling of my deep-seeded need to completely gtfo, get out of dodge, overcame me, i put in my two weeks, and out the door i went. with no lease on my hands, i was virtually free to come and go as i needed, wanted, always dreamed, and embrace each winding turn, each lazy sunny afternoon spent in the middle of a wide angled valley outside the yosemite park entrance, surrounded by acorn wood peckers, chipmunks doing their inversion balances on nearby boulders, hawks gliding far ahead, and the sun melting my skin like ice cream in a hot bikram yoga class. at this moment, which was not just a dream, but had soon become an overtaking reality, shimmering in its greatness and stillness, i could not help but know in my bones that nomad had i become, surfing from one bed to another: in my car, in my best friend’s parent’s house, in my new fling’s room, my grandparent’s and parent’s houses, back to my car, and onto the next bed. it had become a lifestyle for me, and i had faced myself with no choice but to fully embrace it in all its luminescence and sheer beauty. whenever would i have a life this flexible, free, and flowing ever, ever again? when could wine and cheese turn into a beach adventure under the stars, parked on the sand, windows down,ย fog rolling overhead with the sweet hum of the night rustling in the background? when in my life would i ever be able to pick up and leave, come, and leave again whenever my heart desired? would i ever…..

so these months as ‘zoey, the wandering nomad,’ spent wifiless, wondering where my next meal will be, if there will be my beloved fruit, if i have enough isopropyl fuel to make my sweet, sweet, steaming coffee the next sunrise morning, if the boogers in my nose are 75% or 97% sand, dirt, bird poop, and nose drip and if i can extract them pain free, these months have been the light of my life.
and i sit here now, jobless, searching for only three days, wondering where my next turn will take me, i look back and feel the love in my heart expand in deep gratitude for the opportunity to have the opportunity, the pure privilege to embark on such a great adventure… still nomading, still wanderlusting, but searching for roots, bringing peace, confidence, happiness, calmness, and serenity into my heart, my fingertips, my mind with each and every single step and stop.

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i cannot help but sense the profound excitement of today, of this world, even amongst all the deeply negative, troubling occurrences that we have found ourselves, us as a world face with today.

in this unknown, intermediate time as job-searcher, uncertain yuppy with a heart wide open and welcoming to the world, i cannot help but wake up, be patient, find love, feel it in my fingertips, keep to positivity, stay to my focus, and maintain forward movement, of any kind, of all kinds, no matter how challenging. i believe out of such challenge, out of hardship, comes opportunity, light, love, success.
so i plow ahead. each and every day.

 

 

YOU CAN’T USE UP CREATIVITY.
THE MORE YOU USE, THE MORE YOU HAVE.

~maya angelou

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